How dabbling in the Occult almost ruined me…

330px-John_Henry_Fuseli_-_The_Nightmare

The above painting is a very famous painting by Henry Fuseli painted in 1781. This is one of my personal favorite paintings and is a really good representation of an experience I had once.

When I was young I remember as the younger sister being tormented by my older sister. My first supernatural experience was when my sister and I were in our backyard playing and we had this downhill slope in out backyard that led to a very sad dried up creek area, but the best thing about it was this little area where the sun would shine through on all this kudzu that was overgrown and a small weeping willow tree. Right next to this area was a bigger oak tree that had a typical swing hanging from it (by typical I mean literally a board on a rope tied to a branch). I remember my sister racing me down the hill and letting me get on the swing and then she twisted the swing up as tight as she could and let it go, while it spun out of control I saw her run back up the hill just laughing away. I began to get scared because the swing was spinning so fast and felt like it would never stop, and then I saw something…I saw a man standing right up the hill watching me and as the swing continued to spin he would continue to get closer, I was paralyzed at this point. I no longer cared about the spinning of the swing. As the man continue to get closer I closed my eyes tight and got stopped harshly by my sister who heard me crying. This was my first experience.

So like many many other young people, I went through a time period where I questioned religion….ALOT. I was brought up Baptist ( yes I’m southern) and knew and felt at a certain age that I needed to really do some soul searching and find out what I really believed in without any outside influences. (If you’ve ever felt this way please share your experience with me!!)  So this led to a lot of weird mishaps.

I went through an awkward stage where I was Wiccan ( no offense Wiccans) and I very much believed (and still do believe) in the supernatural/spiritual realm. As a hobby I would read Tarot Cards to my friends and we also dabbled in a Quija Board….I know! I know! Bad idea right?! So we knew the rules for the Quija Board, what not to ask it, what was ok to ask, etc. Of course, I was young and rebellious as hell so I didn’t care.

I started to have some very odd experiences which is why I do not partake in the Quija Board anymore and I also no longer believe in referring to the supernatural realm for any answers to any questions I have.

One night about 6 or 7 years ago, I was sleeping in bed and my bed was positioned where my head was next to a window in my room, I was sound asleep and heard someone calling my name almost like they were trying to coax me awake. At first I thought it was my fiancé at the time who was sleeping next to me on the other end but he was sound asleep and no where in the direction of where I heard my name being called. I looked to where I heard my name being called and saw a distorted face in my window. Of course I freaked out and woke my fiancé up and in turn my dad heard the commotion and came into the room also. They believed that it was someone maybe stalking me or trying to mess with me…but I know the truth because I know what I saw and heard.

After this experience and some others, I decided to drop Wicca as a religion and stop dabbling into the Occult. After I stopped dabbling, the experiences almost immediately stopped… granted…anytime my sister and my bestfriend would use the spirit board….if I was in the room the spirits would not speak to them unless I was using the board also….weird right?! So I thought all was good, I had no other bad experiences until about 4 years ago, I was sleeping and I remember waking up and not being able to move. I could move my hands but not my arms, it almost felt like someone or something was sitting on top of me pushing on my chest because I couldn’t breath. It was the scariest thing I have ever experienced because I felt like something was trying to kill me. My door came open with my sister at the other side of it and I immediately was able to move and breath. I have no idea why this happened years after the other experiences.

I have since then found a religion/lifestyle that suits me very well and has nothing to do with talking to spirits (thank goodness!) Since finding Buddhism, I have not had any other experiences and for that I am grateful. The stuff that I was dabbling into was very interesting and I do understand that people are curious and I LOVE that people are curious!! If you have had any experiences like this I would LOVE to know about it and talk about it!! Just please do be careful as to what you practice and remember that there are always consequences to what you do!

XoXo Severed Knowledge